Losing Hope

I am participating in NanoDrawMo 2016 this month. It was created for amateur artists to come together on WordPress and create art daily. The challenge is fifty drawings or paintings in thirty days. No prompts or specific ways to create. Just create and post. I am excited! My first post I used pencil, Faber Castell India ink pens, and acrylic paint.

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I’m forgetting things I want to remember, and drowning in memories I cannot forget. I do not remember his taste or his smell. Everything is foggy. Why? I can wash off the other’s stench and sweat, bodily fluids sticky on my skin, but not the memory. My right cheek shoved against the cold and damp window, I stare out into the evening. It is almost over. Then I can fill my cup full again of warm, amber liquid supposed to help me forget. It is only erasing him. My eyes are already seeing my surroundings in a blur, a tat covered female screaming erratically and hitting in jealous rage the other I try to forget. My cheek is still cold. Shoved in an Uber with an apology and half filled bottle of amber liquid. I guess the apology was for my used and sore body parts. I try to see him but I can not. My mind will not forget my pants around my ankles, cheek shoved on cold glass. Why do Uber drivers always want to tell you their whole life stories like you are their therapist? I sigh, snuggle up to my bottle of amber liquid, knowing when home, it will fill my belly with blissful forget. Blurry eyes fill full of wet, making traffic lights flash by in pretty bright colored swirls. I feel more of him loosen and float away.

Ash

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15 thoughts on “Losing Hope

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